There is almost nothing to make you more restless than the time after the first date. While you are still processing your own impressions, you may be asking yourself the question: How does he think? And above all: how should I behave now?

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It is getting late. You open the door of your apartment, but you still don’t want to go to bed straight away. You grab another drink and sit on your couch.

You wonder briefly whether you watch another episode of this new series, which your best friend recommended, but you catch yourself looking thoughtfully out of the window.

The lantern in front of your window still shows enough. You notice that you haven’t even turned on the little light in the corner.

You enjoy the silence. You had a really nice first date with ” Ben “.

The first date always has a special magic. Getting to know someone for the first time, experiencing something more intensely together and watching the other person – this is a moment that many will never forget.

So much is already decided here. Whether you have something in common, whether you share the humor, whether you have a starting point at all. Either something has arisen here or it will probably be nothing.

The four moments of the first date

It is not even a matter of both knowing that the first date will of course be followed by the second date. There are really many who circle around for a long time before they get more. But even those would never have gotten this far without a good first date .

And that is why most of them deal with many feelings. There are actually four key situations:

  • The greeting
  • The first touch
  • The first joke
  • The farewell

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It is certainly not a big secret that it is important when you are greeted. Only the reason for this is unfortunately very unromantic: in a split second, your sense of smell will clarify whether you should get any closer in terms of purely young talent.

So if you sometimes wonder whether you like to go too far too quickly on first dates: this is nothing compared to your subconscious. And if you can’t smell yourself, you can only hope that it will at least be a pleasant chat. The spark is then mostly out.

Therefore, the greeting is pretty crucial for all thoughts after the first date. It is also not unimportant how you touch each other for the first time. It is less important whether you and Ben just shook hands or went straight for a hug.

Maybe you’re the open guy or you already knew something about Ben anyway. It is not important how you touch each other, but where. So the first touch of our skin is another important exchange.

The largest organ has a say

After the chemistry, you test yourself here whether you are healthy. So before you exchange the first words, your nose and your skin have basically clarified everything. We cannot take this down or overcome it – it has to be right here!

That is exactly why we often hear lovers singing praises like ” she smelled so great ” or ” her skin was so soft ” instead of ” and this one story from her primary school – it clicked! “And if even married people find it difficult to name the partner’s eye color, then we obviously have other priorities.

With one small limitation: humor. It rarely happens that someone like Ben comes along with an Ostfriesen joke shortly after the first drink order. Often the first date is more about situation comedy or minor silliness. But even if it gets flat – your reaction is important here.

If after smelling and feeling you also find a wavelength in the sense of humor, then everything has already been clarified for the first match date . If you really with his penchant clearly come for guinea pigs or he of your preference for pathology exhibitions – eliminates her then just later.

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The first impression cannot be faked

Therefore, it is of no use to pretend. Because three things that you can hardly control are decisive: the smell, the touch and the humor. Therefore, focus more on whether it really works between you.

This often happens when you say goodbye. There could be whole books on the different forms of parting. The only important thing is like a good film: if the end does not ignite, it leaves a bland aftertaste on everything in front.

How you hug each other, whether you hug each other and what you say is up to you. There is no statement here about whether you will see Ben again. Have the courage to do what is in your heart.

And of course the first date can also end up in the box if you want to. But that can mean that completely different instincts have taken the helm. That would go too far at this point.

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What does he think after the first date?

It was obviously going very well with you, because you are now sitting on your couch and are still very animated by your first evening together with Ben.

If you are wondering what Ben thinks after your first date together, there are different options.

Most likely, it falls into one of these 4 categories:

  • The type ” immediately in love “
  • The type ” I didn’t notice “
  • The type ” I-look-still “
  • The type ” I’m out “

Let’s start at the back so that the saddest case is behind us.

Mr. ” I’m Out “

There are dates when at least one side quickly realizes that it is simply not true – very often due to the physical reactions mentioned.

Now Ben was obviously polite and went out of his way to make the evening beautiful. But that doesn’t mean that he will feel something for you. It will depend on how he reacts to you in the next few days.

If Ben is one of those who are looking for an exit after the first date , it is usually very important to them to let you feel it. They are very interested that you do not give yourself unnecessary hope.

If Ben means a lot to you anyway, it is not forbidden to try again. Not trying to do something is always worse than never knowing what would have been.

But the chance of a really happy togetherness is extremely small – much less than getting to know someone a few days later who works much better.

Mr. ” I-look-still “

Very often, on the next first date, you may encounter the type ” I-look-still “.

From friends, Ben likes to get the tip that he should always date with several at the same time. He has probably heard this saying before:

“ Other mothers also have beautiful daughters. 

Of course there are men who then drive in multiple tracks so that they don’t miss a chance. Ben is more likely to seek protection, however, not to put everything on one card and possibly to point too much into you.

This can even be an advantage for you , since he is not desperately planning everything for a future with you. If he then thinks about you more often, he can be sure that he is really interested in you.

At the same time, you will also have to be a little more active. Drilling is allowed here. This in turn makes it clear to you: Do you want to take the next step with Ben at all?

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Mr. ” Didn’t notice “

The following applies here: Please don’t give up right away.

Because it may well be that Ben is even the type who just doesn’t understand that there’s something between you. He doesn’t notice it either during or after the first date.

Perhaps our Ben has read the wrong sign a lot and made false hopes and now he doesn’t know himself: “ Was there something? Should I try more there? 

Ben’s friend then says sentences like: “ But you got on really well with yesterday’s pretty girl, right? 

Only now will Ben notice that there was something. Especially when it runs naturally between you and the first evening feels like you’ve known each other for a long time, men like Ben like to stand completely on the tube.

All too often, some women think at this point that the first date was probably not promised to him. He just might not have been there in the situation.

Maybe he’s more at work right now, maybe he’s worried about his family or he’s still hoping for someone else.

No matter what fills his senses – just because he doesn’t immediately notice that something was there doesn’t mean that he doesn’t notice it after a certain time. It is important for you, however, that it is not worthwhile for everyone to wait until the fine gentleman has had the antennas trimmed .

There are 4 different types of men!

This anonymous test helps you out
with what you’ll be happy.

“What type
man

fits to you?”

Find out!

Start the test

This test will help you find your dream man. With this unique test we want to give you the opportunity to get your problems with the men’s world under control. So take 1 minute and answer all 6 questions.

The results vary from person to person and you will be offered perfectly tailored solutions.

Mr. ” Immediately in love “

It also happens not infrequently that men like Ben are immediately blown away on the first date .

You are completely filled with these different emotions and feelings after the first date. From now on they like to write messages almost every day, immediately push for the second date and already have two children with you in their heads and discuss with them the color of the roof tiles of your house on Sylt.

Of course, this is not entirely safe for you. Because there can be many different motifs here :

  • He is underutilized.
  • It is very erratic.
  • He doesn’t have a lot of dates.

 

The first motif is relatively obvious. There are sure to be friends of Ben who warn him against going on a first date under physical pressure. Too often Ben does it anyway. It is not always clear to Ben that it is clear where the interest in you comes from. He probably won’t even think about sex on the first date . It is much more about physical closeness, care and a mental exchange.

It can also happen that Ben literally falls in love with almost every woman. He may just be looking for security and that it somehow fits.

But beware: He finds his new colleague at work just as great soon – and starts to falter.

Last but not least, it can be – especially with particularly attractive men – that Ben only very rarely comes to dates. Ben can no longer differentiate between whether he has only a slight interest or is completely crushed. First he puts all hope in you and in himself.

 

Be curious about each other, give yourself the space

Now ” your Ben ” will probably be more of a mix of possibilities, one attitude more, the other characteristic less.

Your first date can actually provide a good foundation that you will remember for a long time. But not anymore either. You should have developed a natural curiosity , but it does not mean sunset in the senior citizen.

The second date should therefore be a chance to really get to know you and to check whether it was more than just a mood of the first evening.

Until then, all you have to do is classify his actions on the first date. Also watch what it does to you. And in case of doubt, help a little if he is standing too much on the tube and give him room to react.

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DarkSideZodiac

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