Signs you’re destined to be together

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Falling in love is the best feeling in the world. It’s a high that can begin with the first look or touch, and it grows as you get to know the other person more intimately.

But despite the time you enjoy together and the effort you’ve put into the relationship, you might be wondering if you’re destined to be together and you should make a more serious commitment.

When you get to that stage, you can second-guess your gut, and start looking for rational reasons why he or she is “the one.” This is especially true if you’ve had bumpy relationships in the past. You might not even believe in kindred spirits.

No, finding your soulmate isn’t as obvious as being struck by lightning or fitting into a glass slipper. But, don’t lose hope. When you take a step back and examine your partnership with your heart and your head – and look for valuable clues, you’ll know whether a person is right for you.

These are 10 sure-fire signs that you’re destined to be together:

1. You have an unexplainable, deep connection.

Many people think you have to feel love, at first sight, to know that you’re meant to be. Not so. A feeling that you fit together often does happen early on, but it deepens as you get to know each other. Then, it hits you one day. You love this person on many levels, and you know you’ve never experienced anything like it. Simply put, your soul has been stirred.

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2. You laugh at the same things.

As Dr. John Gottman, a renown therapist says, “Couples who laugh together last together.” If you can find humor in a difficult situation, you can probably get through anything. And, if you laugh at the same things, that’s like glue for a couple. If you can be warm and playful together, and laugh a lot, you’re going to experience much joy.

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3. You have undeniable chemistry (including sexual attraction!).

If your eyes hold a gaze without any awkwardness, or you feel drawn to touch each other unconsciously, you’ve got some good chemistry happening. That same connection is likely to extend into the bedroom, and though you may want to think your relationship could survive to be platonic, sexual attraction is going to make it more exciting and enjoyable.

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Biology does a pretty good job at picking partners, so if the chemistry is there, don’t yield to it. Consider it as a sign.

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4. You feel at home

When it’s relationship kismet, you feel safe and protected. You can be your authentic self, no one judges you, and you don’t have to change. Being in love is like snuggling up by a fire under a cozy blanket on the couch. It feels like home.

5. You can disagree respectfully.

Couples in it for the long term don’t have to be mirror images. If you become drawn to the qualities that you lack, like being spontaneous when you’re naturally a planner, that can be a source of stress or stimulation. Soulmates are seeking to become whole and to explore new aspects of their personalities.


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In a mature relationship, you can disagree with each other and be ok with it. You don’t need to be right or make the other person feel less than. Instead, you appreciate their different perspective and become curious versus furious.

6. You share a common purpose.

There’s a high that two people in love share when they are destined to be together. They are on fire, moving toward similar goals and in alignment with a shared purpose in life. It doesn’t matter if it’s giving to those in need, planning to raise a family, or traveling to exotic destinations, you feel in sync. Life isn’t any longer just about you; it’s me and you for the world!

7. You lift each other up.

When you find the right person, you feel supported – whether that’s someone cheering you on or stretching you in new directions. Your personal growth matters and you’re a much better person together than not. You’re like two balloons reaching new heights.

8. You “get” each other.

Forever couples are in tune with each other’s needs. After a while, when they’ve figured out each other’s love language, a helping hand, a touch, a text at just the right moment says it all. After all, you just want to be understood and acknowledged, right?

9. You’re there for each other when it counts.

A test of your relationship is a willingness to drop whatever you have going on and being present when you get the call. The call when your mom is in the hospital, you’ve lost your job, or you’ve fallen ill or some other crushing blow. If your significant other has stood with you for your highest highs, and lay down with you during your lowest lows, you know you have your lifelong mate.

10. You’re willing to do what it takes.

Often you can get clues from how a person lives their life outside of your relationship. Do they get back up when they’re knocked down? Do they persist in getting what they want – even in the face of obstacles? If the answer is yes, then they are likely to go the distance with you, too.

Sometimes couples argue or need time to process a disagreement or painful emotion. That isn’t necessarily unhealthy. What is essential, though, is how quickly they bounce back from it and seek to move the relationship forward. Couples who are meant to together find a way to work through challenges no matter what.

Finding your soulmate changes your life in subtle and profound ways.

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If you recognize these 10 signs, congratulations, there is no doubt that you’re destined for one another.

Realizing that you’re meant to be together is the starting point for relationship bliss. Then, to keep it alive, free will needs to kick in. Committing to someone you love is a choice you make every single day.

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January 2021
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