Sometimes we are our own worst enemies and sabotage our chances of getting what we really want. Relationships, careers, fitness…we can derail ourselves in all areas of life. It’s a hard reality to confront … when there’s no one to blame.
I’ve been writing about relationships for years and can’t help but notice patterns in where women go wrong. It’s not anyone’s fault. No one sets out with bad intentions, trying to sabotage their. Usually, all a woman wants is to keep her relationship strong and happy. She wants it to last, but oftentimes she still ends up doing things that can push a guy away and ruin a relationship.
Yeah, being this way might be “yourself,” but it’s the worst of you. Why not make an effort to refine those weak spots and be your best self? This is how you win.
Let’s look at some common areas where a lot of women go wrong in relationships and how to resolve them:
1. You choose partners who can’t give you what you want.
You will never get what you want if you keep settling for what you don’t want.
Maybe you’re only drawn to emotionally unavailable people who just don’t treat you right
Going for partners like It can happen when deep down you feel unworthy, you feel not good enough. And these feelings are usually rooted in childhood pain and trauma.
So deep down you have these beliefs about yourself, and then you go out into the world and try to date and try to find a partner but you only seem drawn to the ones who don’t want you. And this is because the subconscious mind is always looking to prove itself right. If you believe you are unworthy, you will be drawn to partners who make you feel that way.
When someone does show genuine interest, you may be put off because this doesn’t align with how you see yourself. You don’t truly like yourself and you, again this is subconscious, believe anyone who does like or love you must be fatally flawed.
2. You don’t understand your triggers.
Don’t let your emotions run the show, you have to look at why you’re reacting the way you are in certain situations. When we have an intense, reflexive emotional response, it’s usually the result of a core wound being touched upon or activated.
Try to identify what it is, especially when you have a strong reaction to something pretty trivial.
Trace it back to your childhood- what were your unmet needs? And how might these needs be showing up in your adult relationships?
