Are you enticed by the idea of a NSA fling thing? Use this guide and these tips to get yourself a no strings attached relationship buddy in no time!
Many guys and girls love the idea of a no strings attached relationship.
All the fun with no hassles of being tied down?
The idea seems really exciting, because you get to have the cake and eat it too!
But is it all so rosy and fun?
Are no strings attached relationships for you?
Quite frankly, no strings attached relationships are a lot of fun, but it isn’t for everyone.
Not everyone can handle the delicacy of this fake relationship that feels like love but isn’t anything more than a few moments of lust and fun.
For some, it starts off fun and turns into a one sided romance.
For others, it ends with insecurity and jealousy.
And for almost everyone else, it ends in awkward encounters where one or both partners try to avoid eye contact for the rest of their lives!
When are no strings attached relationships good for you?
If you’re a big believer in love and fairy tales, or if you like the whole idea of rescuing someone or being romantically rescued by someone, then these casual NSA relationships aren’t for you.
You may just end up falling in love with your casual sex buddy, even if they have no intention of dating you seriously. [Read: 10 casual relationship rules to keep your fling just casual]
Here are 6 best workable scenarios for no strings attached affair.
#1 You’ve had a bad breakup and just want to have some fun.
#2 You don’t have time for a committed relationship.
#3 You love your space, but you love sex too!
#4 You want to stay single and avoid commitments for a while.
#5 There are so many cute and sexy things all around you that you just don’t want to be tied down to a single person.
#6 You’ve been in a long term relationship, and just want to explore a few fun opportunities before settling down again.
No strings attached relationships work only when your mind has the maturity to disassociate love from sex. But unfortunately, it’s not something most of us can do. As humans, we always end up emotionally attaching ourselves when we have frequent sex with the person. [Read: 10 worst people you can have a no strings attached relationship with!]
Most importantly, don’t lie to yourself. Don’t try to convince yourself that you can enjoy sex with someone, get intimate and have personal conversations with them, and still stop yourself from falling in love with them.
11 things to keep in mind for successful no strings attached sex
If you’re interested in hooking up with someone for a no strings attached relationship, here are a few things you need to keep in mind.
#1 Good friends. Don’t have no strings attached sex with a good friend of yours. If things do go downhill someday, you may jeopardize the relationship. As friends, both of you may talk and interact often. So you’re mixing emotional intimacy with sex, which is a perfect concoction for a romantic relationship. One of you may fall for the other person, and the arrangement could just confuse both of you! [Read: 6 sneaky ways to accidentally kiss a friend and get away with it!]
#2 Don’t get emotionally involved. Don’t have casual no strings attached sex with someone you’re in love with, or someone you have deep feelings for. It may just be your excuse to get closer to them *and hurt yourself eventually*.
#3 Protected sex. Always have protected sex with a no strings attached partner. There’s no way you can ever know just how many others this person is sleeping with at the same time.
#4 Be honest. Always be truthful and don’t try to sugarcoat your words and your feelings. If it’s not working out, it’s not. It’s alright to be selfish and walk out when you feel like it.
#5 Make it clear. Have a conversation with your partner so both of you know where this arrangement is going. It’s just casual sex and nothing more. [Read: 25 friends with benefits rules you definitely need to remember]
#6 Don’t sleep with a random stranger. If you’ve hooked up with someone, that’s acceptable. But if you want to turn this person into a no strings attached partner, always make sure you know the person better. Get to know them over a few dates or conversations, and then initiate the no strings attached scenario.
#7 These things end. Don’t hate yourself for it, or hate your partner. No strings attached relationships end all the time, once one of you get bored or want to move on. Have fun while it lasts, but don’t get attached to it.
#8 Don’t screw an ex. You can’t have no strings attached sex with an ex, because it just defeats the purpose of avoiding emotional attachments. Of course, it may work for a while, but one of you may end up falling in love. If you really want to screw your ex again, then you can try this arrangement with them for a few weeks, and back away after that *or you may end up falling in love*. [Read: Things you need to know before getting back with an ex for sex]
#9 NSA sex can cure heartbreaks. You’re going to be having a lot of fun with your NSA partner, and odds are, it may help you heal faster and it may help you overcome your feelings for your ex sooner too. But don’t look at NSA sex as a replacement for your ex. It’ll only make you feel empty and used. Instead, look at it as something fun and recreational you’re doing to keep your mind occupied.
#10 Make your pleasure the priority. Be selfish, and worry about how much fun you’re having. If you spend too much time thinking about dressing up, trying to look good for your sex buddy, or wondering what your sex buddy would think about your behavior and appearance, you may end up falling for them. Focus on having fun, and when you’re sexually satiated, leave! [Read: The complete step-by-step guide to turn a friend into a sex buddy!]
#11 Don’t get carried away. If you have fun having sex with a casual partner, that’s good. But don’t get carried away. Just because you’re an attractive hottie who can get anyone to sleep with you doesn’t mean you should get carried away and sleep with anyone who tries to get your attention. Test the waters with one partner, wait a few months and see if you like it. If you find yourself sleeping with more than one person in a night, you probably need to slow down and take control of your life.
How to proposition someone for a no strings attached relationship
There are many ways to get a no strings attached partner. It all starts with a flirty glance and a naughty conversation where you hint at this sexy someone that you like them, and yet make it clear that you don’t want to date them.
After all, if you just tell someone that you like them, they’d assume you want a serious relationship.[Read: 5 tips to pick the right guy and 19 ways to hook up with him for sex] [Read: 6 tips to recognize a girl who wants to hook up and 12 ways to hook up with her in different circumstances]
So if you’re looking for a naughty fling thing, just make these three things clear *subtly* while talking to them. One, you’ve had your share of relationships and are just looking for some fun right now. Two, you’re single. And three, you find them very attractive and sexy.
Use the same order when you’re trying to send the message across. Making it clear that you aren’t interested in a relationship first makes it seem like it’s your lifestyle choice for the moment. But if you tell someone that you find them attractive, and then tell them that you’re just looking for fun, it would appear like you’re making a proposition for free sex!
Just let the person know you find them attractive. You’ve already made it clear that you’re looking for a no strings fling thing because you’ve mentioned that before flirting with them. And when you do start flirting with them, they’d start flirting back with you if they like the idea of having a no strings attached relationship with you. [Read: 13 lusty signs of sexual attraction that could lead to NSA sex]
5 ways to find a no strings attached sex buddy
So now that you know how to make your intentions clear without making the whole deal appear like a sleazy proposition, here are 5 ways you can use to find yourself a perfect sex buddy and have a NSA relationship with them.
#1 Flirt with casual friends. You may have a few acquaintances or friends you know. They may be on friendly terms but they may not be friends you hang out with often. Call them up or start texting them occasionally over a few days. And once you start flirting with them, you can meet up a few times and see where it goes. [Read: How to make a sexy booty call to a friend without making it obvious!]
#2 Get introduced to a sexy hottie you like. So you know a guy/girl who knows a guy/girl. And you’re interested in doing the naughty with your friend’s friend. Use your friend to get introduced to this person, flirt a few times and see if they reciprocate your interest. Just remember to take it slow and easy. Try too hard and too fast, and you may just creep this person out.
#3 A hook up. This is the proverbial one night stand you meet at a party or someplace that leads to sex. So do you like someone you slept with, but aren’t interested in a relationship? You’ve slept with them already, so just make the proposition.
#4 An ex coworker. Have you been hopping and skipping between jobs over the last few years? Then you’re bound to have met a few cuties from your old workplaces. Make a few calls, flirt a bit and meet up for a chat. And if your ex colleague likes your idea of a strictly sex relationship, well, that’s good news for everyone involved!
#5 An old friend from school or college. Facebook is a great place for reacquaintances and hook ups. Get back in touch with an old friend that you thought was cute, and flirt with them over facebook or over the phone. It’ll start easy, and it may lead to a really exciting night! [Read: 12 devious ways to see a sexy friend naked!]
When is it a good time to end a no strings attached relationship?
Once you find yourself in this arrangement, you need to ask yourself if you’re happy to have this arrangement with one or more people. If you are, well, then that’s great for you. But when a no strings attached relationship starts to take too much importance in your mind, or if it starts to make you feel unhappy, you’re probably falling for this person and you need to either back away or confess your intentions.
On the other hand, if you meet someone you really like while sleeping with your no strings attached buddy, and you hit it off in a more-than-just-friends kind of way with this new person and both of you decide to get serious with each other, it’s probably best for you to end the no strings attached relationship with your friend and move on to something a lot more serious and meaningful.
Well, as you can see, finding yourself a no strings attached relationship and hooking up with a sex buddy is really easy. All it takes is some discretion, a bit of panache and a clear mind that won’t get love and lust mixed up in the head!