Having a successful relationship doesn’t require being the same age. May December relationships have many advantages. If it’s love, it’s love.
Typically, when someone talks about May December relationships, there is an assumption that it is an older man with a younger women. Over the past decade, however, things have begun to even out. More younger men are seeking out women who are older for various reasons.
Movies like The Graduate presented a boy coming of age who is seduced by an older married woman. Once called a “cougar,” older women and young men are finding that May December relationships aren’t just sexual, but can make for a real, lasting, and blissful union.
The popularity of the May December relationship continues to increase and become more socially acceptable regardless of who is older and who is younger.
10 major advantages to May December relationships
A relationship depends on more than just age. Undoubtedly, someone your own age may have a similar perspective on pop culture, but that by no means signals that they are a good fit. The success of any partnership depends on the emotional maturity of both members. And, when it comes down to it, age is rarely a good gauge of the maturity of an individual.
There are many advantages to May December relationships regardless of whether it is an older man with a younger woman, or older woman with a younger man. [Read: When does age difference in relationships matter?]
#1 Less drama. When you start out together coming from the same life circumstances, you go through the same life stages together. Almost like heading out on the great unknown without any way to know how to steer the ship, the stress of trying to mature together can sometimes be too much and take distraction from the relationship itself.
But in May December relationships, one of the individuals has the advantage of going through the hardships of growing up and has the perspective that the other might need help navigating.
Having someone who has already been through the difficulties of struggling in life can be a great comfort and provide emotional support that you just can’t get when you are both facing the same life struggles simultaneously.
#2 Less self-absorption. When you date any older person, they are less likely to base everything on looks. As you get older, you realize that there is more to a person than the way that they appear on the outside.
You know that it love is about what people possess on the inside too. When you date an older person, they are less apt to worry so much about the superficial things in life and to cherish the inner you, not just the way you present to the outside world. [Read: Age gaps – The new trend in relationships?]
#3 Done messing around. Someone who is established in life is less likely to date around and want something that is more stable. Not willing to waste their time on someone they don’t find intriguing and worth it, they aren’t going to play games or hard to get.
If they show interest, they probably have the maturity to be real, honest, and to take a chance. In May December relationships, both parties will likely be looking for someone to share their time with and know that time is not endless. [Read: 9 Relationship stages that all couples go through]
#4 More comfortable with themselves and know who they are. There is something awesome about dating someone who has already gone through the crisis of figuring out who they are and what they want.
Your twenties are a time of turmoil trying to decide who you are, what you want, and who you want to be. When you date someone older, they already know who they are, have accepted those things about themselves that may not be the best, and aren’t insecure about them.
When someone is comfortable in their own skin, it is much more comfortable to be around them. Dating someone who isn’t trying to be who they aren’t, or trying to figure out who they are, is a huge advantage of May December relationships. [Read: Older women dating younger men – What’s really in it for the woman?]
#5 Money isn’t an issue. One of the hardest factors in any relationship is money issues. If you date someone who is older, they are likely to be monetarily established and have more disposable income so that you aren’t constantly quarreling about who pays for what, or worrying about your last dime.
When you take the stress of money out of a relationship, you will be surprised at how easy it is to get along with someone. Money can turn even the best relationship sour. When it isn’t a factor, it is one more reason that a partnership can flourish. [Read: Cougar dating – 10 rules to dating an older woman]
#6 You don’t have to worry about what they will look like. Have you ever dated someone hot and wondered what they would look like in a decade? It is hard to tell if someone is going to take care of themselves, age well, or even have their hair in ten years.
When you date someone older, you don’t have to worry about how they will look when they get older… you already know. If the person you are with is already ten years older than you, and looks better than half the other people your age, then you don’t have to worry that in five years you will be looking at a bald man with a beer gut. Or, a girl with twenty pounds more in sweatpants sitting on your couch beside you.
#7 Sometimes people are old souls. There are just certain people that you get along with more than others. Not an age thing, dating someone older doesn’t have to be an issue if you “get” one another.
Sure, there might be subtle differences like knowing the same bands, but that also can be the fun of May December relationships. You can both bring your own world into the relationship for variety. If you both have an open mind, there is never any boredom or lack of new adventure to be had.
#8 The financial means for fun. When you are in a relationship with someone younger, it is hard to travel the world and take time from work simultaneously to do the things you want to do together.
When you date someone who isn’t beholden to the nine to five and has the financial means to do things when they want like traveling on a whim, or just doing things that you otherwise wouldn’t have the option, life is one big exciting journey to behold.
Being able to experience things when you’re younger is an amazing advantage to a May December romance. Instead of waiting to retire to do the things you want, you can do them all while you are still young enough to enjoy them. [Read: How to make an older woman fall in love with you]
#9 It can keep you young. When you date someone who is younger, they can help to rewind the clock and bring you back to a time in life when things were less responsible, and you were more willing to take chances.
Dating someone younger can help you find the inner child that has long since put their toys away. Like a new lease on life, dating a younger man or woman who adores you can breathe new life into yours. [Read: Dating an older man – 9 reasons you should do it at least once]
#10 Less jealousy. People who are less emotionally mature are usually more jealous than those who are more secure and established. If you are tired of the guys or girls your age acting out of jealousy, being controlling, or stopping you from being you and doing what you want to do, one of the advantages of a May December relationship is that there usually is not a whole lot of jealousy involved.
An older man or woman is more likely to give you space to breathe, to live your own life, and not to try to control what you do and who you are.
Everyone matures at a different rate, and typically, it has very little to do with age. There are many times when two people are meant for each other even if they don’t share the same generation. If you are considering dating someone who is older than you, there are a lot of advantages. Stop worrying about what others will think and do what makes you happy.
In the end, age is just a number, and unless you allow it to define you, there is no reason why you can’t date someone who is five, ten, or even twenty years older.
As you can see, May December relationships can be amazing. If you were meant to be, they make you happy, and you just get each other, then go with it and stop thinking too much about candles on a birthday cake.