Is your routine showing signs of a boring relationship? Do you need to find a way to bring the spark back? I’ve got you covered.
Relationships are not just go with the flow. They require effort, energy, and sometimes hard work. But that is what makes an amazing relationship worth it. So, if you’re seeing these signs of a boring relationship, it’s time to get to work.
The thing is, once you get comfy sitting around binging Netflix and eating pizza, things can get boring. Now that may sound like a perfect date to you, but when there is zero effort being put into the relationship on both sides, it can get boring and get boring fast. [Read: 15 reasons why almost all couples get bored with their relationship]
What are the signs of a boring relationship?
Before getting into the details, a boring relationship does not necessarily mean a bad relationship. With a little care, love, and passion it can be fun again.
#1 Routine. Routines are great for jobs, pets, and children, but having a routine with your partner does not yell romance, passion, or fun. Planning a date night every Friday is good, but if you go to the same place over and over and order the same food, things get dull. [Read: 25 must-follow relationship rules for successful love]
#2 You have the same fights. If your fights always lead back to the same topic, like you never do anything fun anymore, I’m sorry to break it to you, but your relationship is boring. If you fight over what movie to watch and who has to clean the bathroom this week, you are probably snoring your way through this courtship. [Read: Here is what to do when you need to reconnect with your partner]
#3 You’re glued to your phone. The spark in a relationship doesn’t last forever. Even before smartphones and the internet, that was the case. This technology comes with even more distractions.
Here’s one of the clearest signs of a boring relationship for you. If you are laying in bed and both haven’t spoken a word or looked up from your screen, something is not quite right there. If you are tagging each other in memes while sitting next to each other rather than actually talking, you may need to get your priorities straight. Starting with admitting that you’re seeing the signs of a boring relationship in your own “perfect” romance.
#4 You don’t talk about your feelings. When you first start dating, you have butterflies, you’re giddy, and you share how excited you are. Although it can be nice to have the comfort of a long-term relationship, once you are used to that person, you stop sharing because you think they already know.
If you haven’t said I love you, had a meaningful discussion, or talked about your feelings lately, it doesn’t mean something is wrong. It could mean you are in a rut. You expect your partner to know you so well at this point that taking the time to share things just doesn’t seem necessary. [Read: 30 naughty questions for couple to keep the sexy spark alive]
#5 Your bed is for sleeping. Sex or some sort of physical connection is one of the most vital parts of a healthy relationship. This is what set your spark off in the first place and it is what helps passion continue.
So if all you do in bed is sleep and swipe through your phone, you are officially in a boring relationship. [Read: How to spice up your relationship]
How to bring the fun into a boring relationship
A boring relationship is not all out of hope just yet. There is plenty you can do to make things fun again. Break out of your routine. Turn your boring relationship into an exciting one.
#1 Talk about it. To stop your relationship from continuing down its boring path, the first and best thing you can do is talk about it. If you and your partner aren’t on the same page, it will not work out.
Mention that you feel like your relationship has fallen into a rut and you want to shake things up. Throw out some ideas like going away for the weekend, rock climbing, or just exploring a nearby town. [Read: 20 signs you’re stuck in a boring one-sided relationship]
#2 Be spontaneous. Some people might head to the airport and get on the first flight leaving. But if that is too much for you, I get it. So instead, make small gestures.
Surprise your partner at work and take them for lunch. Set up a fun backyard date for when they get home. Or plan a secret date and have them do the same.
#3 Include others. Even though you’re aware that your relationship needs a perk up, once date night comes around, what is stopping you from plopping down on the sofa and watching TV?
Invite others into your plans to give yourself more accountability. If you have a double date planned, you are less likely to cancel or fall into your rut. Ask another couple you know to go bowling, mini golfing, or to an escape room. This keeps things exciting, and hanging out with other couples can keep things fresh. [Read: Double dating ideas and why it’s fun to go on one]
#4 Try new things. I don’t know about you, but I am a planner. Being spontaneous is not in my nature. So if I wanted to break out of a boring relationship, I would suggest trying new things together.
If you always do dinner and a movie, instead sign up for cooking lessons or tennis lessons. Go scuba diving or learn how to dance or speak another language. Learning new things together is fun, brings you back to school days, and shows you how good you are together.
#5 Do something physical. Okay, get your head out of the gutter. I mean couple’s yoga, kickboxing, or even an adventure camp full of zip-lines and trust exercises. These will get you back in the swing of things physically and help you remember what your relationship might be lacking.
You can even paint a room, plant a garden, or wash the car together. These may seem like silly household chores, but they are great ways to have fun while accomplishing something together. [Read: 20 fun things for couples to do and get out of the boring routine]
#6 What if nothing works? Sometimes none of these will work. That doesn’t mean your relationship is beyond repair, just that you may need a helping hand in repairing it. Couples therapy can give you a closer look at what got you into a boring relationship in the first place so you can find the perfect way to have fun again.
Switching up your routine and reigniting the flame can work, but finding a professional who can get to know you and your partner on a deeper level will help you tremendously.
Say goodbye to all the signs of a boring relationship with these tips and tricks. You no longer have to yawn your way through dinner and snore your way through dessert.